A New Novel

I've been working on the next Owen family novel, and here's just a taste of the beginning.

Marie Owen pressed forward through the crowd surrounding her brother Carl and his new bride, her friend Ellen Bates. Ma was hugging on Ellen, then it was Albert, kissing Ellen's cheek, then Marie reached her, and threw her arms around Ellen.

"Lawsy, I thought this day would never come for you, and suddenly you're Mrs. Carl Owen. My sister!"

Ellen pushed back from the embrace slightly, her green eyes shining like dewdrops. "Yes. I didn't figure Pa would bring the priest with him," she whispered. "Who would have thought..." She looked around the meadow. "Where is James?"

"Now don't you fret about him on your weddin' day. He'll get over his disappointment."

"I wanted to tell him how sorry I am."

"Don't bother. He's acted like such a ninny, not letting go of his claim on you when it was clear as the nose on your face you were in love with Carl."

Ellen ducked her head and turned to look at her new husband, who was sitting himself down on a chair. "I can't believe it's happened so fast." She turned back to Marie as people shoved against them. "Carl's bleedin'. I have to get him home." She gripped Marie's hand. "You're next. I see the way Bill Henry looks at you."

* "What?" Marie protested, but Ellen had slipped away, motioning to Rulon and Clay to pick up the chair to bear Carl away. A crimson stain spread across the hip of Carl's trousers, and a shiver of fear coursed down Marie's spine. Carl hadn't yet recovered from the wounds he'd suffered in the shootout with kidnappers at a cave on the mountainside. Was he going to bleed to death because he got out of bed to marry Ellen?

Remember, this is pure off-the-top-of-my-head organic writing, and it's very much first draft stuff.

Comments? Critiques? Ideas?

* New paragraph added to clarify some stuff. I stopped too soon.