Saturday, October 19, 2013

Sweet Saturday Samples - October 19, 2013

Welcome back to Sweet Saturday Samples. In this tidbit from my work-in-progress, Gone For a Soldier, Rulon Owen's father-in-law Randolph Hilbrands makes him a present of a dashing cavalry hat.
~~~


"Ah," Rand said again, evidently satisfied with the answer. "Have you a hat?"

"My everyday one is all, sir."

"That will not do." Mr. Hilbrands arose and went to the sideboard, where he opened a door and drew forth a slouch hat decorated with a black plume and held up on one side with a pin. He brought it to the table and reseated himself. "Now this is an acceptable hat for a cavalryman," he said, holding the headgear in reverent hands. "It is after the fashion of the one worn by Colonel J.E.B. Stuart himself. I imagine he will be your ultimate commander."

Rulon gulped. "I reckon that's a mighty fine hat, sir," he managed to say. "Much obliged."

"The best available."
~~~


Such a well-meant gift, but it will cause Rulon much embarrassment in coming days.

I hope you enjoyed this sample from my work-in-progress, Gone For a Soldier, set during the American Civil War. Thank you for visiting. I love to read your comments, so if anything in the sample compels you to speak up, rest assured that I eventually read what you write and will reply, if needed. Questions? I'm open to them, too.

Please come back next Saturday for another sample. Thank you!

Saturday, October 12, 2013

Sweet Saturday Samples - October 12, 2013

Welcome back to Sweet Saturday Samples. In this tidbit from my work-in-progress, Gone For a Soldier, mother Julia Owen and her daughters have been working on a surprise for eldest son, Rulon. Enjoy!
~~~

When Rulon came into the house at noon for dinner, Julia had been so intent upon the project she was doing with the girls that she was caught at what had remained a secret for some days.

"Ma," he said, his rising voice reflecting his surprise.

She stood and tried to put the work in her lap off to the side where he could not view it, but knew he had seen what they were up to. Marie had similarly shoved worsted material down on the floor beside her, but Julianna wasn't so wise, and only froze with her needle caught in grey fabric.

"Is that a uniform? I haven't even heard back yet from Captain Yancey. Why would you--"

"The answer is 'yes,' and it doesn't matter if you go with the Harrisonburg Troop or some other company. I reckon you're a-goin', and we have to put the best shine on the matter." She knew she sounded a bit defensive, but couldn't help defending her action in preparing a proper send-off for her first born. "I know you are set on bein' a cavalryman in this tussle, so you'll go as the fine-lookin' son of Roderick Owen of Shenandoah County, with a grand new suit of clothes, even if it is a uniform." She stood as straight as she could, hoping she didn't dissolve into tears and shame herself.

"We're beholden to Miss Mary for keeping silent about the material your ma purchased," Rod said from behind Rulon. "It was difficult for Randolph Hilbrands to find the braid, but he persevered, and found it in a shop down to Richmond." He walked over and held up the decorative sleeve resting in Julianna's lap. "The outfit will serve you well, wherever you end up."

The other boys crowded into the room behind Rulon, who stood slack-jawed, half-blocking the doorway.

Ben crossed over behind Marie and picked up the pants she had been working on. "Ha! A gold stripe down the leg? This is too fine for you, Rule. The Yankees will think you're an officer and shoot you on sight."

Rod swung around, saying, "That's enough, Benjamin."
~~~


With all the work of managing a household in this time period, I imagine it must have been difficult, not only to find the time for doing extra labor, but for keeping it a secret from other family members, as well.

I hope you enjoyed this sample from my work-in-progress, Gone For a Soldier, set during the American Civil War. Thank you for visiting. I love to read your comments, so if anything in the sample compels you to speak up, rest assured that I eventually read what you write and will reply, if needed. Questions? I'm open to them, too.

Please come back next Saturday for another sample. Thank you!

Monday, October 07, 2013

Elmore Leonard's Ten Rules for Writers

We lost the brilliant American writer Elmore Leonard in August of this year. In honor of what would have been his 88th birthday this Friday, October 11, I'm posting a bit of writing advice he gave us that has become almost as famous as he is.

Ten Rules for Writers

1 Never open a book with weather. If it's only to create atmosphere, and not a character's reaction to the weather, you don't want to go on too long. The reader is apt to leaf ahead look­ing for people. There are exceptions. If you happen to be Barry Lopez, who has more ways than an Eskimo to describe ice and snow in his book Arctic Dreams, you can do all the weather reporting you want.

2 Avoid prologues: they can be ­annoying, especially a prologue ­following an introduction that comes after a foreword. But these are ordinarily found in non-fiction. A prologue in a novel is back story, and you can drop it in anywhere you want. There is a prologue in John Steinbeck's Sweet Thursday, but it's OK because a character in the book makes the point of what my rules are all about. He says: "I like a lot of talk in a book and I don't like to have nobody tell me what the guy that's talking looks like. I want to figure out what he looks like from the way he talks."

3 Never use a verb other than "said" to carry dialogue. The line of dialogue belongs to the character; the verb is the writer sticking his nose in. But "said" is far less intrusive than "grumbled", "gasped", "cautioned", "lied". I once noticed Mary McCarthy ending a line of dialogue with "she asseverated" and had to stop reading and go to the dictionary.

4 Never use an adverb to modify the verb "said" ... he admonished gravely. To use an adverb this way (or almost any way) is a mortal sin. The writer is now exposing himself in earnest, using a word that distracts and can interrupt the rhythm of the exchange. I have a character in one of my books tell how she used to write historical romances "full of rape and adverbs".

5 Keep your exclamation points ­under control. You are allowed no more than two or three per 100,000 words of prose. If you have the knack of playing with exclaimers the way Tom Wolfe does, you can throw them in by the handful.

6 Never use the words "suddenly" or "all hell broke loose". This rule doesn't require an explanation. I have noticed that writers who use "suddenly" tend to exercise less control in the application of exclamation points.

7 Use regional dialect, patois, sparingly. Once you start spelling words in dialogue phonetically and loading the page with apos­trophes, you won't be able to stop. Notice the way Annie Proulx captures the flavour of Wyoming voices in her book of short stories Close Range.

8 Avoid detailed descriptions of characters, which Steinbeck covered. In Ernest Hemingway's "Hills Like White Elephants", what do the "American and the girl with him" look like? "She had taken off her hat and put it on the table." That's the only reference to a physical description in the story.

9 Don't go into great detail describing places and things, unless you're ­Margaret Atwood and can paint scenes with language. You don't want descriptions that bring the action, the flow of the story, to a standstill.

10 Try to leave out the part that readers tend to skip. Think of what you skip reading a novel: thick paragraphs of prose you can see have too many words in them.


Great advice, Mr. Leonard. I'll try to keep it in mind as I write my fifth novel.

Sunday, October 06, 2013

Saturday, October 05, 2013

Sweet Saturday Samples - October 5, 2013

Welcome back to Sweet Saturday Samples. In this tidbit from my work-in-progress, Gone For a Soldier, Miss Ella Ruth Allen makes an attempt to redeem herself with the man she loves and foolishly cast aside due to her pride.
~~~


Once the girl who was the closest link she had to Benjamin left her to herself in the back room, Ella Ruth crossed her arms on the desk and rested her forehead upon them. At last, after all the waiting, she had received the directions to which she could write to him, and she had no idea what words to put on the paper.

Whatever she wrote, it must appeal to his sense of fairness, and must convince him that she had undergone a true change of heart. She knew she had done wrong by him, but it wasn't enough to convey only that important message. She had to somehow soften Ben's heart toward her, for she knew she had caused him such pain that he would guard it most carefully against further hurt from her.

"I was so unbelievably heartless to you, my love," she whispered. "I refused to acknowledge how the world was changing."

She raised her head and took the pencil in her hand. There was plenty of paper in the pocket folio. She would simply have to try setting down what was in her heart, and if the first try did not suit, she would make another attempt . . . and another, and another, until she had it right.

She took several deeps breaths, licked the tip of the pencil, and poised it above the top of the sheet of paper.

Her fingers seemed to have no bones, and she dropped the implement. It rested where it had fallen, rebuking her for such absurd folly.

She hung her head. This was a senseless endeavor, foolish and vain. He would never forgive her.
~~~


I hope you enjoyed this sample from my work-in-progress, Gone For a Soldier, set during the American Civil War. Thank you for visiting. I love to read your comments, so if anything in the sample compels you to speak up, rest assured that I eventually read what you write and will reply, if needed. Questions? I'm open to them, too.

Please come back next Saturday for another sample. Thank you!
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